Ok so I officially feel like I have failed at blogging this week.
I haven't posted since Tuesday, I have no posts half written, I have photos taken, some edited, some not yet I still can't seem to put any words together. I feel like I have failed, which is making it even harder to actually put a post together.
I tend to put myself under a lot of pressure, not matter what is. In my work life I'm my biggest critic, I have a lot of responsibility with HUGE targets to be met and occasionally it can all get a little too much and I go into melt down, but with work I can just pick up the phone and talk openly to my area manager about how I'm feeling, and every time she manages to pull me out of it and give me that kick up the butt that I need and tells me that I CAN do it, and you know what, after that I come back bigger and better than ever.
The problem with blogging is that there is no one aside from myself who can kick me up the butt and get me motivated and positive again, I have to do that myself and you know what some times it's bloody hard to do that.
I love blogging, I never realised how much I'd enjoy it and I'm so proud of how far my little blog has come along since I started it. I guess that's why I do put a lot of pressure on myself, I always want to better myself, improve my writing, photography and content. I want to look back on my blog in a year, two or even three years and feel proud of my blogging journey and take great pride in seeing how much it has grown since day 1, and believe me, nearly a year into blogging I already do feel proud.
I didn't realise how hard blogging would be during the Christmas period. This was the one month out of the whole year that I was looking forward to blogging the most. I love reading everybody's festive inspired posts, their gift guides, the Christmas tags, the Christmas makeup posts, I literally love them all and had hoped that I would be able to bring some festiveness to JustJulie, but this month has been so hard.
Working full time whilst blogging has always been a struggle, but I always kept on top of it and the one time I didn't have a post ready to upload, my friend Sian at Sian Marie Beauty Blog kindly stepped in a gave me a post she had planned for her blog and allowed me to upload it with her as a guest blogger.
But this month I've failed. This time of year is my peek trade at work. Of course it is, I work for ghd, and believe me almost every body wants something ghd related for Christmas. I have a very high target that I just refuse not to hit, failing my target is not a possibility, it must happen. It's not like I'll get in to trouble for not achieving it, but in the past year and a half I've missed it just once, which was after achieving it 13 months in a row, that wasn't a good feeling. I'm working longer hours which is making me feeling very tired and as a result has made me not want to do anything when I get home, I just want to unwind, pop my pjs on, snuggle up into bed and just watch a film and try to get a good nights sleep. I've also not been too well, I hurt my ankle a few weeks ago and then two weeks ago I came down with the flu, which is still lingering around and has made me feel pretty crappy. So all of that has kind of knocked me back.
I guess I've discovered that my full time job has to come first. I can't allow blogging to have any form of negative impact on my job, especially this time of the year. I must be on top form for when I start a very busy day.
I don't want to churn out any old crap on here, that I myself don't feel 100% happy with, just for the sake of making sure I post every other day. I have been offered several sponsored posts this month, all of which I had to refuse because I can't commit to their time frame and no amount of money is worth me rushing a post just to earn a few extra £££
I'm not sure when my next post will be up, or if this will be the only post this week, but maybe it will do me some good to just take a short break from blogging to relieve a bit of pressure? I don't care about views declining, not gaining new followers, I just care that the people who do already follow my blog understand where I'm coming from and that I need just a little break.
I started this post off feeling like I had failed, but as I come to the end of this post I actually feel a lot better about getting this off my chest.
Hopefully I'll come back bigger and better than ever!
Until Next Time